International Babywearing Week=giveaways (yes, plural)

As y'all know, babywearing holds a soft spot in my heart.  That's why I kicked off my return by kicking off Babywearing Week.  Well, today I said, why not kick it off with a bang.  I'm a little too accident prone to actually use anything that goes "bang" so instead we'll do the next best thing, giveaways.  And yes, I did mean to make that plural.  We will do them all week, with the finale being the drawing by random.org.

We will start off with one from Sew Attached, in other words, me.  Yep, in case you hadn't heard, I opened up a Facebook store in my abundant spare time (you know, with #5 going off to 4K and all).  This giveaway is for a knit doll pouch with matching cross body bag for your toddler.  It is in a nice unisex "sky" color and will fit up to about age 5.  The bag will fit a cute little board book (or in our case, the Kindle Fire) and will fit even longer than that.

The above picture are the actual items being given away, I couldn't take action shots because my children were in the middle of making messes so couldn't come anywhere near them.  Below is an action shot in another color.  If you prefer the one below, that color is discontinued, but you can bid to win that set in the upcoming weeks at TBW Benefit Auction.

 



So how do you win?  First, like the donor, Sew Attached on Facebook.  Then comment below.  That's it, no need to follow the blog (though you'll probably want to so you don't miss the rest of this weeks giveaways).  You can get extra entries by sharing this post on Facebook, Twitter, your blog, a message board or group (where it isn't against the rules, don't go breaking rules and blaming it on me), etc and commenting with the link.  You get one extra entry for each place you share but there is a limit of 3 extra entries to make it fair for everyone.

Good Luck, and check back all week for more Babywearing Week posts and giveaways as well as Sunday to see who won.

Welcome back

It has been 6 months since I posted. I know everyone has been waiting. I know I failed miserably at my goal to post a whole year. For weeks I've been meaning to get back at it. Every week I read my Aunt's blog posts and am reminded I need to post. Every week I get too busy, or put it off for a "special day".

As we welcome another year of International Babywearing Week I've had several things happen that just seemed to come together for a good blog post on Babywearing. Therefore I decided the first day of IBW would, not only welcome IBW, but would welcome me back to Blogger.

Last year I posted about what Babywearing was, what it meant to me, and my history. This year I want to talk about how uniting and universal it is.

As you see me on any given weekday it is pretty obvious I am a stay at home mom, from my (very) casual dress to the kid (or more) in tow. That's probably where the obvious ends (unless you see my van). I have 1 or 2 kids with me, neither are still nursing age. And I am a pretty average mom age (well unless I don't dye all my grays). Would you be able to guess I was once a young mom? Would you be able to guess my religion? Could you tell my socioeconomic class? That I have 6 kids? That I have a child with special needs? My hobbies? My political affiliation? I bet you can't.

Even when I have 6 kids in tow you really don't know anything your assuming. Your first guess? Hmm, maybe that I'm on welfare (not sure if that would be because of my kids or my dress), would be wrong. I'm not and I never have been. But does that really matter? In this economy especially, people with 2 kids have just as great a chance to need help. 2nd guess, more than one father, again wrong. Again, does it matter? If the children are being taken care of, what does it matter? Lastly you start assuming religion or hippiness or whatever else would possess a seemingly same person to have 6 kids. Society's value given to children has really influenced the way people view them in all aspects.

I've posted about the mommy wars before. Stay at home vs working, breast vs bottle, etc. But can you tell those things by the cover of every "book"? The great thing about Babywearing is it blends right in there. Everyone is doing it. The reasoning behind everyone's choice to babywear is so different. That makes the people who do it cover such a vast array. Working moms do it, some even at work. Stay at home moms do it, even when they aren't home. Breast and bottle feeding. Those in Europe and those in the Americas. The ones that don't wonder how they can. The ones past that age wish they had.

Everyone mom, dad, grandparent and caregiver can use an extra hand. Even when you don't need an extra hand it's well worth the strain it saves on your back.

I walked through the corn maze this weekend and saw a mom of only 2 wearing her baby. I alternately wore my 2 and 4 year olds. I didn't bring a stroller. I had thought of a stroller but thought the inconvenience would outweigh the handiness. I saw people parking and leaving their strollers. I saw someone with the same nice one I would have brought, struggling through the sand, no stroller does sand well. I saw another mom that really would have loved a carrier. I can't imagine what her arms and back felt like when I saw her still carrying her baby (no stroller in sight) over an hour later.

I see the same thing in the mall or the store. A mom trying to juggle baby and a stroller or cart. A mom trying to calm baby without carrying them, so as to avoid the juggle. It happens to moms of 1 or moms of 10. It doesn't matter if you have a $15 stroller or a $400 stroller (trust me, I have both), its still not fun to push and carry (if you don't have a sling).

Babywearing isn't new, every single country has its own history of Babywearing. If your lucky enough to live in a country where it's still passed down, you already know. Other lucky people have a friend or Lamaze teacher (who first told us) share it. Some find the info in a book. Some frazzled moms stop a mom in the store who is more than willing to rave about her "3rd hand".

Once you have it, you have something in common with people of all walks of life, people from all over the world. The mom of 6 can compare to the mom of 2. The mom with the $200 wrap can commiserate with the mom with the sheet out of the linen closet. A baby in Africa is worn the same as a baby in Asia or America. When it comes to Babywearing there is no question, it is the best solution for moms convenience and baby's security. In that one little thing, there is no war.

The Autism Confusion

The day the new Autism statistics were announced to be 1 in 88 children, I started this post.  It was right as we were coming into Autism Awareness month, another day that I'd start a post.  I was still working on this one.  Here I sit today, still working on this one.  As the statistics came out quietly, they still shot through the internet.  They lit up Facebook pages, message boards, and conversations the world over.  The conversation always seemed to turn to the opinion of those actually dealing with Autism. 

The questions started pouring in, "so what do you think about the new statistics?", "what do you think caused the increase?", "how realistic do you think they are?"  I'd love to have all the answers.  I'd love for anyone to have all the answers.  I'd love to say that it is vaccines.  But I worry how my friends with Autistic kids who've never had a single vaccine would react.  I'd love to say it's the hormones and antibiotics in dairy and meat.  But I wonder how my vegan friends with an Autistic kid would react.  If I said it was a reactive attachment issue, I may insult all the attachment parents of Autistic kids.

The next best thing to say, would be what the government is trying to say.  It's just a response to better diagnosis.  You look at the study information and the sample group used is 8 years old.  That means anyone not diagnosed yet wasn't counted.  Do you know how many kids are not diagnosed until 9, 10, 13, 15...?  I'd love to know more about the cities used, not what they tell us but what the parents in those cities are actually saying.  Is it easy to be diagnosed in that city?  We are rural suburban, but we are only 30 minutes from the state capital.  I'd describe our area as average.  I say that because there are definitely rural areas that have it much worse.  Just as I am sure those living near a much larger university medical center have it better.  Using our city as an example, it can take years to get an Autism diagnosis.  If you are lucky, or you are more moderate, or you are a boy you may get a diagnosis sooner when someone, in the know, spots the signs.  Even in a perfect world you could be put on a year + long waiting list to go to one of very few places that diagnose Autism here.  A place that doesn't take insurance so it is even harder for the middle class.  They take Medicaid so if you have that you're good.  If you're upper middle class, you have the cash or flex to pay.  If you don't fall into either of those categories you have to come up with the $400+ per visit (and it could take 4+ visits) cash, on the spot, to pay for your diagnosis.  If you happen to have a doctor that is willing to refer you, and knows where to refer you, you may be able to get into the Disabilities and Special Needs, Autism division for free (and a much longer wait).  If you aren't in a perfect world, and you don't have a textbook case of Autism, you may be bounced around early intervention, school districts, special education, psychiatrists, psychologists, therapists, etc as you possibly place hope on misdiagnosis, just looking for an answer.  With diagnosis occurring like this, and the number of people I know of, with children over age 8, still waiting for a diagnosis, I find "better diagnosis" to only mean that the rates are going to continue to rise then.  Because we are far from good at diagnosing Autism.

Do I think those numbers are padded?  Sure, I think that some kids are being diagnosed by people not qualified to make that diagnosis.  Sure, I think kids are being diagnosed with Autism to receive better services.  Do I think that is the majority?  No way.  Even the small amount of children that fall into this category, I am sure are countered by the number of children still waiting for diagnosis.

I have written and rewritten because the only thing this post does is create confusion.  I have no actual answers in this post.  I have tried to clean it up, I have tried to say something knowledgeable, but all that's there is confusion.  I realised that is all anyone has.  Confusion.  I tried writing about the "cures", the other controversies.  Gluten free diets, organic, chelation, supplements vs Applied Behavior, therapies, special education.  But I have no answer for that either, because I don't know any kids who have been "cured" from true Autism.  I've seen significant improvement on both sides but Autism is still there.  Adding that debate only added more.  Confusion.  The debate between research funding and treatment funding.  If you think that the only sides are Autistic parents and Neurotypical parents, it is far from the truth.  There are those for a "cure" and those against a "cure".  There are those that feel strongly about 1 way of treating vs another.  There are those with strong feelings about a cause.  But it all leads the same way, there is still no "cure".  All that's left is more.  Confusion.  We all want an answer, we all know there is no point in dwelling on the past.  Yet we all search every aspect of every day of our child's life looking for where this came from.  You think if you knew the answer you could fix it.  Every single Autistic child is different.  What you worry about, a different child never had, what they worry about yours never had.  Confusion.  This is the face of Autism.

Don't count your chickens, err children...

On my hiatus I had left some posts written but not posted. Here's one from the spring, enjoy.

Before they're actually in their beds. Yep, hubby is out of town again. Thursday is our busy day this season. There are pros and cons to having a busy day. If you have a really busy day that means everything got squeezed into that one night. That usually means you get another night off. Right now I don't have to do anything on Tuesdays. The con is you could be somewhere for hours. Thursdays I have to drive to/from horseback riding, writer's club, football, soccer, and teen leaders. After being out from the time school gets out until 8pm we are so ready to crash.

My saving grace, allowing me to get things done in a timely fashion, is kids that fall asleep on the way home, in the car. Just like clockwork the babies fall asleep 5 minutes into the ride. Everything is working in my favor.

The other kids are arguing, as usual. I guess I should pay closer attention to their arguments. I start hearing mid argument. S: really?!, If you were that tough you'd be able to bite the top off your bottle. What does J do but try and prove his toughness. The screams wake up the babies as we pull into the neighborhood. Nosey B had to look, and then comment on the blood. Did I mention J takes after his dad and hates blood? Even bigger screams, these babies aren't going back to bed.

As we pull in the drive it seems like its all falling apart. Trying to get everyone out, trying to check Js mouth, and well aware that no one will be in bed by 8.

Hopes and Dreams

This is not the post your expecting, it's not the hopes and dreams of
my future. It's not the hopes and dreams for my children's future.
Those are all such a short post, I simply want them to be happy,
healthy, and cared for.

Instead I want to talk about what every person hopes they never have
to do without and what they dream they had. Money is so many peoples'
answer to that and it seems so simple. What would you do with the
money? If you had more money would you spend more and need even more?
Would money buy you more time in your day? Would money slow time?

Obviously I couldn't do completely without money since my answer costs
money. Sustenance costs money too. The one luxury I hope to never do
without is a smartphone. I bet you weren't expecting that answer. I
thought about it when the new preliminary report came out, yet again,
saying cell phones can cause cancer.

My smartphone is #1 my way to keep in touch with family. #2 it runs
the family. You thought I ran the family,but without my phone I'd
have no idea where to run. My entire calendar is in my phone (and
backed up with google sync). I truly would forget dentist appointments,
field trips, soccer games and IEP meetings without my phone. I wouldn't
even be able to call and check the appointment times because we threw away
the phone books in favor or google.

Another study comes out http://www.cnn.com/2011/HEALTH/05/31/who.cell.phones/index.html
I find myself, instead of giving up my phone, contemplating the severity
of the situation. I mean, does it increase my risk 100 fold or just 2 fold?
Can I use it just a little or does it have to be none? Is it a treatable
cancer? Yes, I sit trying to justify even the small risk to myself and children
(who can drain an entire battery playing Temple Run or Police Chase). I spend
months pouring over IIHS and NHTSA reports before buying a car. I keep my kids
rear facing in carseats longer. We avoid artificial sweeteners and dyes.
Yet here I am justifying a cell phone. But, the truth is, I haven't seen
anyone without one so I can't be the only person out there justifying it
to myself or even just flat out ignoring it.

I'd give anything for more time in a day. More time on earth. More time
for my childrens', and my own, hopes and dreams. Ok, apparantly I mean, anything
but give up my cell phone.

Silly Putty Personality

Yes, with 6 kids I'm still brave enough to make messy crafts like
silly putty. I guess I should probably point out we don't actually
make "Silly Putty" because that's some patented, copyrighted or
something, brand name. But we call it silly putty because 1st, we
have no idea what else to call it and 2nd, try explaining to a 4 year
old that it isn't really "Silly Putty".

Silly putty is easy to make but made or bought it's much worse than
playdoh, much like bubble gum. Previous adventures in silly putty
making have resulted in having to cut it out of the carpet. Other
adventures with it included very carefully and time consumingly
picking it out of a child's hair to avoid having to cut it out. Would
you believe she put it in her own hair? And no I don't know why,
according to IQ tests, the SAT, TIP, etc she is really highly gifted.

Yet here I am making it again.

It's no surprise silly putty is so messy and sticky, it's made out of
white glue. If that's not sticky enough the only other ingredient is
laundry starch. So needless to say it's messy from the second you
decide to make it. We all know different kids have different feelings
to getting messy. So we start with pouring the glue. Everyone loves
that part and I was smart enough to let everyone have their own bowl.
Next we add some starch to start. Everyone is even nicely taking
turns. Next we start to stir with a spoon. Though this seems easy we
are already starting to lose them. "This doesn't look like silly
putty", "I need more", "how long do we stir it". Now for the hard
part, kneading it with their hands. Now reactions range from "cool"
to "no way". Some quickly finish getting theirs into silly putty
while others would rather complain that it's sticky, it's not working,
and theirs is ruined.

This is where mommy gets to work out her hands, I think I kneaded at
least 4 of them. It started out as just A2, she immediately said no
way. Not that she played with it after either. She touched it then
immediately wanted to wash her hands. It's interesting that media
make toddlers out to be so messy. She even portrays herself that way
by walking around daily with her face entirely covered in something.
Yet, in reality, the second glue (or syrup or ketchup or...) comes in
contact with their hand it's the Apocalypse.

The next to need help was J4, he wasn't sure what he was supposed to
do and wasn't sure about it once he started. However once it was done
he did play and let it run through his fingers.

S6 would have patiently done it all day but I helped her get finished
up and she was fine with me helping. But once done she wasn't all
that impressed with it.

B11 pouted and whined about how she needed more of this or that. She
was certain her's was ruined. She adamantly did not want help.
Though, she did enjoy kneading it and had she not been so stuck on it
being ruined I sm sure she would have had fun. After a 5 minute
ordeal of how unfair life is she let me help and had a lightbulb
moment that her's was fine. When I wouldn't let her take it in the
living room or bedroom, though, she was done with it. But that's ok,
my carpets have thanked me and I won't have to listen to hubby rant.

E14 is the only one I didn't have to do, in true science loving
fashion she enjoyed herself. Though she remembers our previous
adventures in silly putty whereas some others didn't.

Yes, that means we went through all that for nothing. It didn't even
buy me 5 minutes of play. Let's just hope E14 gets a good grade for
the project she used it in.

How to make your own putty: officially the recipe calls for 2 parts
white (or school) glue to 1 part liquid laundry starch. However I
pour in some glue, add a bit of starch, work it in, add more, work it
in until it's the consistancy I want. I do this because it doesn't
really "mix", you have to work or knead the starch into the
glue/starch mixture.

. Plus, it seems an exact measurement never yields the same results.

Silly putty is so much like kids. Making silly putty never happens the same way. The amount of each ingredient is always slightly different, just like each kid needs slightly different things. Despite the same technique used, each silly putty has a slightly different result, just like siblings all turn out differently once grown. Silly putty is moldable and reactive to the person using it yet it will always be stretchy and sticky. Just like you can mold a child but can't change their personality. If you add too much starch you get slime, not enough and all you really have is a runny glue. There is comparison to kids from making to playing with silly putty. Just as you can clearly see each child's difference as they make and play with silly putty.

I wrote this post last year and never got around to posting it. This weekend we made it again at an event at the university. It's interesting to look back and see how the kids had grown but their "silly putty personality" and reactions didn't change at all.

Where have you been?

Yep, I'm sure y'all noticed me MIA. I could use the excuse I have 6 kids, except I was doing just fine until October. I can't believe I made it all the way to October with my New Year's resolution then fell short in the home stretch.

So what did I do from October to now? Holidays. I kid you not. My holiday season starts at Halloween. I have to shop before Halloween for Halloween but also for my niece's birthday right after. Ok, I confess, this year I didn't even shop for her. I did think about it, I even went shopping. I can't even figure out what to buy my own teenager. I was clueless, I sent money. After that I have a son, nephew and another niece with November birthdays (plus Thanksgiving and Black Friday). Then I have a niece, nephew and my own birthday in December (plus Christmas). We followed Christmas with a trip to Florida before my mom an daughter's January birthdays followed a week later by my other daughter's. Yes, in our house "holiday" season is Halloween to Valentines.

I did do some crocheting. I made a nice sweater that I need to get a picture of plus my husband's own afghan. I did have my son's football season. I did have my daughter's therapies. And my husband started traveling again. It's not like I did "nothing".

Oh oh, and the reason I stopped posting. My phone died. I hate change, what an ordeal. I decided, since I loved the Google and Amazon interface to go with an Android. I loved how user friendly it was. It didn't even last the whole weekend though. Then I went to the dark side and got an iPhone. The kids LOVE getting to FaceTime Daddy when he's gone. I love the reliability. I don't love that it doesn't work with the Kindle app or Google products as easily as the Android did (ok and I liked that little alien robot guy). I have spent the last few months figuring out what I never wanted (a touch screen) and learning how to do the blog, etc on the iPhone (ok, and trying a few games).

I am hoping to spend the next month getting the rest of my done but unposted posts up. Maybe I should set a goal for posting this year. Instead I will just hope not to catch the stomach bug the kids all had, at least not on Fat Tuesday. Then think about this Lent since last year I completely failed at every plan I had. Baby L is older this year (though not any less cranky) so maybe there's hope this year. As with everything else, my mantra will have to be "one day at a time".